People tell me that there was a time when being humble, lowering yourself and minimizing your strengths was a virtue. In some countries a worrying large number of people still believe this. Unfortunately it seems to be one of those human traits which is hard to override but is handicapping those people who consider it a virtue.
And in a way it sounds pretty good, doesn't it? Even though I think I am pretty good, I shouldn't tell people that. Then they won't think I am full of myself and I won't make them feel bad about their own lack of talent. Or even if other people tell me I am great, they are just being nice, really I am not so great. Being great is what I want to be... So goes the rambling chain of thought that leads to people lowering, humbling themselves.
Yet from what I can see, being overly humble leads to being taken advantage of and a lot of frustration. When you are too humble to ask why you are not selected for a job, your mind goes nuts with hypothetical situations which are almost always inaccurate and grossly exaggerated. When you are too humble to accept the praise of your colleagues, people have trouble relating to you. When you lower yourself and accept all that bullshit work that is a waste of time, a part of you dies.
I am not advocating total full-Monty narcissism. Just as the world needs people to stop wallowing in their humility, the world does not need more narcissistic, self-obsessed maniacs. Instead we should have reasonable expectations on what should be done. It isn't necessary to be humble just to be humble. That is lying to others and to yourself.
When that company doesn't reply to your application, call, chase them and get an answer. Don't be a bastard, but they owe you a response and you owe yourself a resolution. When people compliment your work, be gracious and try to find some way to return the favor. Mindlessly rejecting praise puts everyone in a mythical land of my-work-is-good-but-really-I'm-not-smart contradictions. When your boss tries to offload bullshit work on you that he / she did not have the spine to question or reject, it is up to you to fight back. Companies today are trying to do more with less but haven't improved efficiency to the same degree. Know why? Because people keep accepting bullshit.
Be reasonable. Being humble is overrated. Be realistic, be respectful of the contributions of others and always demand a return on investment for your time.
We only live once. Don't live it at the back of the storage closet with the lights switched off.
